Doom Scenarios: Holiday Gifts

My immediate response to the United States officially becoming an Orwellian police state has mainly been to focus on ‘new american’ home ec with even more fervor.  I say this in preemptive defense, so to speak, of my decision to turn to Martha Stewart to guide half of my holiday shopping.  Much of what I needed to get was already accomplished by my ransaking of the Lord’s cricket giftshop while I was in London (for my dad) and deciding to get my mom the ole’ alan watts + murakami combo.  She went to Japan a couple years ago.  Anyway, for everyone else I was cooking.

As mentioned, all of my gifts were culled from Martha’s (can I call you Martha?) not-too-upscale tweeish holiday gift guide.  I made the fudge, the toffee (with lavender salt), the caramels, and the marshmallows (gifted with graham cracker’s and mint chocolate squares, copying R’s holiday gifts).  The fudge turned out the best, but only with milk or dark chocolate.  Something about white chocolate makes it not work.  I also realized that making different types of candies mostly consists in heating up butter and sugar to various different temperatures.  Even so, somehow my toffee turned out more bite-able than my caramel’s.  Here’s a picture of the fudge, which, really, was quite good.  Put crushed candycanes on shit.  It’s good.


Anyway, I think my respect for Martha Stewart is growing.  Before I didn’t understand what she did or why she was famous, and then I thought she just got lucky, but no, I think she’s the real deal.  I looked at lots of other homemade holiday gift things, and her were the best, by far.  Even better than Saveur’s cookie advent calendar, which was pretty good.  What can I say, she has a gift.  Either her or her people.


2 Responses to Doom Scenarios: Holiday Gifts

  1. secretmenu says:

    This blog is totally bad-ass. Well done.

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